I was making my way through downtown on I-5 when some crazy old snatch in a Lexus almost broadsided me. She had just entered from the on-ramp as I was comfortably driving down the James Street exit-only lane. I know you have to make your move somewhat quickly to stay out of the exit lanes, but nearly ramming into a three-ton death cab at 60 mph with nary a second look is no way to do it.

I blasted my threatening boat horn, screaming, “You’ll be seeing more of me soon,” and made my exit promptly. As I waited in the middle lane for the light to change, I heard ambulance sirens coming up on my left. I needed to go up the hill anyway, so I cut a hard left turn and followed the wailing vehicle up the hill for nine blocks like a vegetarian vulture.

I hope at least one of the hundred cars facing the other direction in stopped traffic found the image of a hearse tailing an ambulance as funny as I did. It’s the little things in life…